Take Only When Prescribed: Cures for Troubled Times

 

 

Cure #22: The Unknown Dread: Causes and Cures for Panic Attacks

"The book I was reading was not even scary. Yet, all of a sudden, I felt really lightheaded, like all the air had been instantly sucked out of the room. I started to shake and sweat. My heart was pounding so hard I though it would explode out of my chest. It all happened so fast. This time I was sure it was a heart attack! Just when I thought I was going to die…it was gone in 60 seconds. I should have known better - it was the third time it happened this week."
   - Anonymous Panic Attack Sufferer

 

What is Panic?

Throughout most of human history and through much of the world today, the Earth has been a hostile place. Threats to earthly survival from both nature (earthquake, flood, tornado, fire, etc) and natural predators (wild animals, poisonous plants, human enemies) led to the evolution of a "fight or flight" panic response (see the "Stress Cure").

When an individual is in panic mode, all their defensive senses (sight, hearing, smell) are heightened. Their breathing becomes rapid to "stuff" their body with more of the life force in air. Their heart races to quickly spread the oxygen through their system. All of these reactions are designed to help them deal with the threat and achieve the goal of preserving their life. These are all good things when a person is faced with a genuine threat to their life that requires sustained, focused attention to avert.

What is Panic Disorder?

When panic responses are experienced by an individual but are not induced by a genuine threat to their survival, it is time for that person to seriously consider if they have Panic Disorder. This should only be considered if other medical conditions with symptoms similar to Panic Attacks have been ruled out.

Who is "At Risk" for Panic Disorder?

"Panic Disorder begins most often when people are 20-30 years old. It begins less often in teenagers or persons in their forties. It is uncommon for the disorder to appear in the elderly for the first time… about three fourths are women."

From a past life perspective, Panic Disorder attaches to individuals as they are fully establishing themselves in the identity of their current incarnation. Usually the karmic issues underlying the panic are so severe that most children could not handle them. That is why the attachment of the past life karma to the individual is "time delayed" until early adulthood when the fears are better able to be resolved.

Panic Disorder is so disruptive to a person's normal functioning in daily life because it is designed to help the individual break free from fears which have crippled them in many past lives. Having fear assault them full force with increasing regularly ensures that it is not ignored. For ignoring the fear only makes it grow.

What are the Signs of Panic Disorder?

When it is understood that unresolved, unreasoning fears from past lives are the source of most Panic Attacks, the progression of symptoms that result in Panic Disorder can be better understood. All along the way, the individual will be given many opportunities to confront and resolve their fears.

Panic Disorder usually begins with "minor symptoms" like rapid heart beats, hyperventialating, unexplained dizziness, etc in the weeks or months prior to the first attack. The person's initial response is that "I'm just tired" or "It won't happen again" and so on, because they are too afraid to admit there may be a problem.

"Suddenly", the person experiences their first full blown panic attack. Too fearful to ignore undeniable symptoms, the person will often seek an "emergency medical evaluation". Yet by the time this help is available, the symptoms will have greatly decreased and they will be told "everything is normal".

They may choose to do nothing for awhile if they have no further symptoms. Yet the more the individual fails to confront and resolve their fears, the more severe and frequent the panic attacks will become. When the person seeks help again only to be they told that "nothing is wrong with them", it contributes to their rising panic.

Over time, others may accuse them of being "hypochondriacs" or "shopping around for a doctor who will tell them what they want to hear" because medical science cannot confirm that they have a "real problem". Yet no one who has experienced or witnessed a true panic attack can be left in any doubt that they are all too real.

Why is it Dangerous to Leave Panic Disorder Untreated?

The longer that Panic Disorder is not addressed, the worse the symptoms will become and the harder it will be heal. That is because fear feeds on itself.

The sufferer fears a panic attack will happen when it will put their life in danger (as when driving a car), where help is not available (in public places when they are "alone"), or when it will disrupt their life (as when at work or with young children). Just fearing an attack increases the internal level of fear which in turn may trigger more frequent and severe panic attacks.

Fear is a downward spiral that progressively restricts an individual's lifestyle until it leaves them utterly hopeless and demoralized. Their lifestyle may even become so restricted that they turn into Agoraphobics. Or they may believe that suicide is the only answer to their lifelong despair and make their next life even worse.

What is the Best Treatment for Panic Disorder?

The BEST thing you can do for fear is always remember that you "have nothing to fear but fear itself" (Franklin D. Roosevelt). You can overcome your fears but you must be patient and work at in every day. The fear was built up slowly in your system and so it must be broken down slowly. Between episodes of panic you need to be working steadily toward your goal of taking your life back from fear.

When You are Not Having a Panic Attack, you need to take active steps to reclaim your life. Decide right now that you will not let your Panic control and define you life. And if you think that you do not have time for this, spend the time that you are worrying about having a panic attack on doing the following:

1> Identify the Panic Trigger: The first step in breaking down your fears is to identify precisely what it is that is triggering you. Panic attacks are never random: if you believe that they are random, it is because you have not invested the time and the energy to discern the pattern. Begin logging your panic attacks as to:

* where you were,
* what you were doing,
* what you were thinking,
* who you were with at time,
* how close it was to meal time,
* what you ate before it happened,
* what you remember seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, or touching before it happened, and so on.

The more detail you can gather, the easier it will be discern the trigger. Your body and mind are trying desperately to communicate with you via the panic attack. Open you mind, heart, and eyes. Be patient and you will discover the triggering mechanism.

2> Learn the Breath Patterns: Before women give birth, they often take the time to learn the patterns of breathing that will help them achieve a less painful delivery. They repeat the patterns until they are drilled into their brain so that when the time comes, they will be able to do them without thinking.

Panic sufferers should learn Centering, Calming, and Stress Relieving Breaths by heart until they can do them automatically. Memorizing breath patterns in advance will help you to compensate for the severe disruptions in breathing patterns that always accompany panic attacks.

3> Eliminate Artificial Stimulants: Panic attacks often flood your system with adrenaline as your body and mind mistakenly prepare for "fight or flight". The last thing you need to do is to willingly take anything that will artificially stimulate your body or mind further. These artificial stimulants include: caffeinated soft drinks, coffee, chocolate (sorry :( ), herbal energy teas/supplements, or anything else that "will give you an extra boost". All these will do is aggravate your situation.

4> Carry a Panic Emergency Kit: Just like those who must constantly be prepared because they live in earthquake zones, you should never leave home without your panic emergency kit.

This emergency kit should include things like:
* a cell phone pre-loaded with emergency numbers,
* a written list of these numbers and other helpful
information (name of your physician, medications you are taking, etc) that others can easily find to help you,
* items you will be using to combat your panic attacks.

Helpful Tip: For those who are seeking an alternative to anti-depressants, tranquilizers, and other hard drugs, there are natural remedies to assist you with the worst of your symptoms. One that is designed just for times of intense mental turmoil is Bach's Rescue Remedy.

Caution: As with anything you take to alter your mood, be sure to follow the directions and consult with your physician before using. It is essential that you do NOT take these "rescue remedies" unless you really need them. For if you take them too much, they will not help when you really need it.

5> Follow a Panic Attack "Desensitization Plan": Triggers for panic attack can vary over time. Most often, the list of panic triggers will grow as the disorder is left untreated. You should constantly be monitoring your log of panic attacks to watch for new triggers.

For the panic triggers that consistently induce an attack, you must follow a "Trigger Desensitization Plan" (which is better known as the "cognitive-behaviorial" treatment). This plan consists of confronting the "trigger events" in systematic manner:

a> The process starts by taking on the least difficult of the avoided places or activities first for short amounts of time while accompanied by safe, helpful people.

b> The process is repeated gradually increasing the time spent at the evaded place or doing the avoided activity while reducing the number of people required as escorts.

c> Once the first activity/place no longer triggers a panic attack, the next most difficult trigger is tackled. This is repeated until the worst panic triggers are extinguished.

d> The good news is, just as fear is a downward spiral, success is an upward spiral. The time that it takes to eliminate each trigger will decrease every time. Once a critical mass of triggers are diffused, the grip of Panic Disorder can be broken. The truth is that the only way to get past your pain and fear is to go through it. Panic can be beaten if try: all you have to lose are the attacks!

When You Are Having a Panic Attack, you need to rely on your preparation which should includes having memorized this list and/or having it handy. Here is what to do:

1> Breathe:Get your breath under control - whether your breathing is too rapid or too slow - you need to breathe in one of the patterns you have learned (above). Concentrate on following the patterns of your breath for a moment as you find a place to stop and sit so that you can help yourself through the attack.

2> Rescue Medicine: Dip into your panic emergency kit and immediately take your "rescue remedy". By having closely observed yourself, you should know the difference between daily anxiety and a full blown panic attack. You should also know how long it takes to work: look at your watch and time the episode.

3> Call for Help: If you are not getting any relief when enough time has passed, get your cell phone and call for help. If you were having a heart attack, an asthma attack, or a life threatening allergy attack, you would not even question your need for help. Panic can be as deadly any of those other illnesses: take it seriously.

The WORST thing you can do is to numb your body and mind by "medicating the problem away" with hard drugs. Panic Disorder medications like anti-depressants (Paxil (paroxetine), Prozac (fluoxetine), Sinequan (doxepin), Tofranil (imipramine), or Zoloft (sertraline)) and tranquilizers (Xanax (alprazolam), Nardil (phenelzine), Klonopin (clonazepam), or Ativan (lorazepam)) just mask the symptoms. They do NOT solve the problem. Despite "proganda" to the contrary, they can lead to addiction and often require a planned reduction to avoid symptoms of withdrawal. Worse, they can cause a permanent dulling of your connection to universal energy.

These are the last two I am posting on this topic, I hope in some way i have reached someone or at least made them think as life is one big lesson to us all.  We will always be learning.

 

 Take Only When Prescribed: Cures for Troubled Times

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Your Spirit's Basic Minimum Requirements

 

 

Cure #15: When You Just Can't Stop: How to Identify Addictive Behavior

 

 

Getting Off the Addiction Train

What is Addiction? Most think that "addicts" are those who are "hooked on drugs or alcohol". Yet addiction is much more that that... people can become addicted to prescription medicine, cigarettes (nicotine), coffee/soda (caffeine), sugar, work, gambling, exercise, shopping, sex, relationships, etc.

Are You an Addict? How to know if you are addicted to any particular "thing" is by answering the following nine questions about it... honestly:

1> Can you stop doing "the thing" you suspect/others have told you that you are addicted to for a day, a week, a month, a year, or forever?

2> Does the thought of your stopping doing "the thing" for a short time cause you any physical discomfort, mental anguish, or emotional anxiety?

3> Would your stopping doing "the thing" cause you to be "less yourself"?

4> Have you tried and failed to stop doing "the thing" in the past?

5> Do you know that doing "the thing" does not serve you and/or is causing problems in your life (at home, at work, in the community)?

6> Have you lost friends or alienated family members or irritated coworkers because you keep on doing "the thing" no matter what?

7> Have you or are you putting your life at risk by doing "the thing"?

8> Deep down inside, do you really want to keep on doing "the thing"?

9> Does "the thing" control you or do you control "the thing"?

And the Answer is: When you cannot stop doing "the thing". When the thought of what would happen by not doing "the thing" scares you. When "the thing" becomes who you are. When you keep failing at breaking free from "the thing". When "the thing" starts ruining your life. When "the thing" is more important to you than family or friends. When you consistently put your life at risk to do "the thing". When deep down you hate "the thing" but cannot let it go.
......Then, my friend, "the thing" is in control of you and you are an addict.

"One medical definition of an addiction is an uncontrollable dependence on a substance, habit or practice. An addict experiences a severe emotional or physical reaction once they were to stop the activity."

How Does Addiction Happen? One way to prevent or treat an addiction is to understand why it occurs. Doug Dorman, substance abuse counselor for CIGNA Behavioral Health, Inc., a subsidiary of CIGNA Corporation, explains it this way:

"When something makes us feel good, there is a biochemical release in the brain," "This feeling or 'high,' as it is sometimes called, is also experienced by an addict. In addition to the high produced by the addictive behavior, the pursuit of an activity and the excitement of evading spouses, parents, bill collectors or employers can be equally satisfying to an addict. For example, some cocaine addicts have said that they got more of a high from the process of stealing for and chasing down the drug than they did from using it."

From the standpoint of karma and reincarnation, addictions happen like this.

The past life resonance (a pattern of behavior inherited from past lives) is stored in a person's cellular memory from birth. As the individual matures in their new incarnation, they usually (not always) receive many opportunities to "address" the past life resonance in a more gentle and harmonious manner. When they reach the age where "addiction" becomes possible (even infants can become addicts if their mother was "using" during pregnancy), the past life resonance either hook them onto the path of addiction or that resonance is released from the body.

Addictions are always highly karmic in nature. In the case of an infant born addicted, this is karma pure and simple that the individual has to work off. The later in life the addiction occurs, the more chances the individual was given beforehand to resolve their karma more peacefully and harmoniously.

So there is no such thing as a "sudden addiction". The onset of the addiction may seem sudden to the person and to those around them... but there was always a pattern of events leading up to the addiction which made it necessary. If you are an addict and are honest with yourself, you will know the truth of these words.

What is the "Cycle of Addiction"? "Regardless of the type of addiction a person has, they will probably go through the following cycle: feeling good, a loss of control, repetition and then a feeling of denial."

The actual Cycle of Addiction operates in the following pattern:

· The addictive substance or action produces a "high" or "desired" mood change.
· The addict organizes their life around the addictive activity
......(getting it, experiencing it, withdrawing from it).
· The behavior continues despite problems it causes for the addict in their life:
......(work, home, community).
· The addict denies that they have a "problem" despite evidence to the contrary.
· The "desired" mood change "wears off": the addict begins to crave their "next fix".
· The craving becomes unendurable for the addict and they get "high" again
......and so it goes.

What are the Warning Signs of an Addiction? If you or someone you care about has started to display the following warning signs of addiction, please seek out professional help:

· Dramatic Mood Swings (moving from abnormally happy to sad in short periods of time)
· Change in "Personal Habits" (someone normally neat becoming a total slob, etc)
· Change in "Interests" (someone suddenly losing interest in long time hobbies/activities)
· Change in "Associates" (changing friends to those with substance abuse problems)
· Financial Difficulties (always "broke", always needing "cash" for debts that never end)
· Legal Difficulties (people never in trouble with authorities, having run-ins with the "law")
· Missing Time at Work (people full of "lame excuses" for absences from work/school)
· Becoming Physically or Verbally Abusive (especially if they were normally "quiet")
· Social Isolation (always trying to "hide" whatever it is they are now doing from others)

In general, whenever a person radically changes their whole complex of behavior for "the worse" they are addicted. Note that when they suddenly change their behavior for "the better", they may be a "walk-in".

Who is Most "At Risk" for Addiction? Those "at greater risk" for addictive behavior are those with the following "factors":

Physical: Biological, includes genetics: addictions run in families; low resistance to drugs.
Mental: Psychological, includes low self-esteem, depression, and feelings of powerlessness.
Emotional: Situational, includes those seeking escape from grief over the loss of loved ones.
Social: Situational, includes isolation from family, empty nest, relocation from long residence.

At certain times in life, people may be more vulnerable to addictive behavior. The more one needs comfort, escape from unpleasant situations, and solutions from "outside themselves", the greater the risk for addiction.

Taking this one step further, I am of the firm opinion that those who tend to be addictive are unable to feel God's love for themselves. Lacking this warmth, they seek it elsewhere. Yet all that lies at the bottom of the bottle or the end of the needle is pain and emptiness... take it from one who knows.

So How Can an Addict Fight Addiction? Once a habit has become destructive, a person needs to:

· Admit that they have a problem and immediately get help from others (professionals are recommended).
· With this help, identify all the changes necessary to stop or alter the addictive pattern of behavior.
· Set a plan of action and a timetable by which the person will replace old unwanted addictive behaviors with new desirable activities.
· Be patient with the process: it is important to remember that recovering from an addiction takes time.
· Expect setbacks: everyone makes mistakes, all that matters is how one responds to them and moves on.
· Seek out and find God's (Or "your" higher power) love: no one need look further than their own heart to find it was there all along.

 

 

 

 

 

 Your Spirit's Basic Minimum Requirements

 

 

Cure #14: The "Me" Cure: Listen to the Right Music/Your Voice HEAL!

The "Me" Cure: The "Me" is sound: as in "do, re, me, me, me!" (Remember the scales you always hated in music class!)

Everything in the universe is energy. You may appear to be "solid" matter but looks are deceiving. If you magnify your cells down to your atoms, you would see that you are made up of subtle energy fields and not matter. As those in the realm of physics are just discovering, the basic building blocks of energy are light (the I Cure) and sound.

Sound energizes and harmonizes all life. That is why "sound healing" has become such a widely used supplement to traditional and alternative medical treatments. That is why "cures" employing "light" and "sound" technologies are gaining such popularity today - not to mention the grudging respect of the scientific community.

The "Sound Cure"- Using Alternative Healing to Heal "What Ails You": Steve Halpern said it best: "studies have shown music (and sound) can reduce stress, enhance immune system function, slow down and balance brain wave activity, reduce muscle tension, increase endorphin levels, and evoke feelings of love and inner peace." For it is "unrelieved stress" that underlies "a wide range of diseases such as hypertension, heart attack, stroke, ulcers, migraine, irritability, inability to concentrate or sleep, and sexual dysfunction".

1> About Relaxation: In "a state of deep relaxation or meditation, the electromagnetic field surrounding (one's) head literally… attunes to the basic electromagnetic field of the Earth itself." For the "Earth's harmonic resonance has been measured at… 8 Hertz (Hz)." This is the also "the frequency range of the electrical activity of the brain that we access in stares of deep relaxation."
.......... So whenever we connect with the Earth ("in a forest, in the mountains, or by the ocean"), we naturally relax and become rejuvenated.

2> About Music: "One of the easiest ways to restore balance is by listening to music - but only certain music. Most music is composed for entertainment, dancing, or emotional release - and makes your nervous system more nervous!" All "music affects us physically, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually."
.......... Specially designed relaxation music "affects the human energy field by helping it reorganize and shift into a higher order of functioning which most music does not do. Ancient sound technologies, such as Tibetan singing bowls, mantras and chants, are based on this right-brained, holistic approach."

3> About Mantras: Mantras are "chakra based sounds." The "letters in the Sanskrit alphabet correspond to the lotus petals" that are traditionally used to depict the shape of the energy chakras.
.......... When a Sanskrit mantra is uttered, the related chakra vibrates in harmonic resonance, energizing the inner and outer bodies accordingly. Universal energy flows more freely and at a greater rate into the chakra, energizing and attuning the inner and outer bodies of the person who chants them.
.......... This in turn helps the person to feel stronger in body, clearer in mind, more uplifted in spirit, and experience the relaxation response.
.......... For a "cheat sheet" of the most powerful mantras, click here!

How to Do the "Sound Cure": Specialized relaxation music and energy based mantras heal "by assisting the body(-mind) to come into its natural state of balance and harmony". This works because your body was created to be "a self healing instrument" (see the Rules for Healing, Illness, and Recovery).
.......... The "body heals itself most effectively in a state of deep relaxation." Sound - specialized relaxation music and energy based mantras - is what builds the "relaxation-healing connection" to restore balance and harmony.

1> Sound and Light are Energy Sources: In healing, it is the combination of light and sound which always produces the most profound healing effect.

.....a> Light and Sound are Everywhere All the Time: Think about nature. Bees are always buzzing, birds are always chirping, day and night - rarely is nature ever completely quiet. And even the darkest forest, the deepest cave, the most bottomless ocean are not completely devoid of light.

......b> Sound Healing: "When we pronounce a particular mantra while visualizing an internal organ bathed in light, the power of the (sound) and the (light) become concentrated in that organ with beneficial effect."

2> Energy Based Sounds Heal: Mantras that you chant and music that heals you both use energy based sounds.

.....a> Energetic Healing Power: Healing music and mantras derive their power from the energy effect the sounds produce.

.....b> Harmony Heals: All physical sounds heal only if they have the vibrations that produce harmonious energetic effects on the outer physical and the inner energy bodies. That is... sound only heals if it is based in energetic harmony.

3> Clear Intention Focuses and Increases the Effectiveness of Sound Healing: The intention that we hold in our heart and mind as we chant the mantra or use the healing music increases it's effectiveness.

.....a> Power of Intention: Your intention - WHY you are using these sounds - powers their energy as you chant the mantras and as you allow the healing vibrations of the music to suffuse your being.

.....b> Clearing Cellular Memory: Sound Healing harmonizes the body, quiets the mind, and center the individual on spirit. A natural result of this process is the release of toxins from your cellular memory as you move from negative to increasingly more positive levels of vibration.

4> "Be Still And Know": "It is in the stillness that we align and attune to the deeper spiritual dimensions of life. It is in the stillness that true healing occurs, as we connect to Source." When chanting mantras or listening to healing music "there is no need to 'do' anything; all you need is to 'be' with the music."

......a> "Energy follows Thought": "If you are paying attention to something outside of you, less energy will be available for internal healing purposes." So let your "mind shut down, so you are free to be in the 'hear and now' with the music."

.....b> It Must Work for You: "The most important consideration is whether a given piece of music works for you! One size does not fit all!" Music works the best "when it has are no 'hard edges'. This is because the tones must be "easily accepted into the body". For my list of the best, click here.

5> Sound Connects You More Directly to the Source: Sound connects us more directly to the Source because it moves us past the lower vibrations of languages. Here is how it works:

.....a> Paradox of Sound: The paradox of sound is that the language which makes communication possible is also the construct which prevent us from having a pure experience with the Source.

.....b> About Languages: Language serves as an intermediary between the pure "bubble" of information that floats down to us from the source and the finite minds at various levels of consciousness which struggle to interpret and comprehend that information. In fact, there is a direct correlation between the degree of structure in the language and the degree of structure in the society which speaks it.

.....c> About "Pure" "Sound: Pure sound is what liberates one from the construct of language so that a purer contact with the source can be made. "The true nature of the mantra is the experience (of the Source) that it ultimately creates in the individual who chants it." We have a "cheat sheet" of the most effective tones for healing your chakras and your inner energy bodies.

6> Healing Sounds Produce Spiritual Energy of Great Intensity: Sound healing energy is a lot like fire: "the same fire can cook your lunch or burn down the forest." So treat mantras and sound healing as you would fire: with the greatest respect, being careful not to be burned.

.....a> Caution: If you feel uncomfortable with how the sounds are making you feel, this is your body's way of telling you to slow down or even to stop. When you use mantras, you connect with the "wisdom of the body" and once you begin to pay attention to it, your health will improve dramatically.

.....b> If You Want to Speed Up: "Intense mantra activity can be disconcerting. Imagine trying to clean a swimming pool with several inches of mud accumulated on the bottom. The very act of putting a suction hose on the bottom of the pool and turning on the motor will cause the muck to swirl up into the clear water above. Clarity will be temporarily obstructed as the water appears to become dirtier than it was before. This is similar to some effects produced by the intense use of mantra."

 

 

Your Spirit's Basic Minimum Requirements

 

Cure #13: The "I" Cure: Take Off Your Glasses and SEE!

 

 

The I Cure: The "I" is light as in "I am a being of light!"

Everything in the universe is energy. You may appear to be "solid" matter but looks are deceiving. If you magnify your cells down to your atoms, you would see that you are made up of subtle energy fields and not matter. As those in the realm of physics are discovering, the basic building blocks of energy are light and sound (Me cure).

Light sustains and nourishes all life. That is why "cures" employing "light" and "sound" technologies are gaining such popularity today - not to mention the grudging respect of the scientific community

The "Light Cure"- Healing to Correct "Your Eyesight and Insight":
Dr. Liberman said it best: "the shift to a new way of seeing is not physical: it has more to do with (your) willingness to accept an expanded vision of life. If you are just doing eye exercises, without being willing to transform how you see the world, (any eye) exercise (is) unlikely to have a significant, lasting effect on your vision. If you (realize and accept) that you are on a 'vision quest', then you will be on a path toward profound healing and transformation on all levels of your awareness - and exercises become tool(s) that support your progress."

How to Do the "Light Cure": The truth is that most vision problems "are the result of your desire to avoid looking at some aspect of your life." As with all other spirit based treatments, to solve the problem you must face the issue. Dealing with the symptoms (getting glasses) only "masks" the problem.

The truth is lasting "vision improvement is a dynamic process of reawakening your insight, your inner relationship with the world."

1> Before you begin, give your permission to open yourself to greater awareness. The only way you can do this is by moving through and then by moving past your fears. Do this by saying:

Show me, universe, what I am afraid of seeing (past fear)
Show me, universe, what I am afraid of being (present fear)
Show me, universe, what I am afraid of becoming" (future fear)

2> Allow yourself to experience whatever it is that comes up for you. Often that will be tears. If it is tears then let them flow. Remember that crying in healing and the only way past your pain is through it. Just give it as much time as "feels right" to acknowledge your pain before continuing on with this exercise.

3> Put your eyes in a state of "Open Focus" (this is a trademarked term of Dr. Les Fehmi). The core of the technique is to "allow your visual focus to soften and expand" until you can see everything all around you without focusing on any particular object. Allow everything you see to become equally important to you. This enables your eyes to relax and to be "in continuous, spontaneous movement."

4> Take both hands and curl all your fingers except your thumb into your palm. Extend your thumbs out as if you were a Roman Emperor about to give "thumbs up or down" to someone. Before you begin, make sure that your hands are clean and your fingernails are short (and never stick your fingers in your eyes!!!!).

5> Do this exercise with your eyes WIDE OPEN, being careful NOT to put your fingers in your eyes. The point of this exercise is to increase your awareness and shutting your eyes sends your body and mind the wrong message. This is how this cure differs slightly from the Chinese Eye Cure (only steps 6 to 9 below).

6> Do Acupressure Eye Point #1: AIR by performing the following steps:

a> Blink four (4) times slowly so that you are conscious of what you are doing.
b> Place the tip of each thumb on the inside corner of the eye.
c> Move the pad of each thumb up so that it rests on the inside eyebrow corner.
d> Your thumb should be connecting the inside corner of your eye and eyebrow.
e> Press down on your thumb in a massaging motion at least 7 times.
f> If you can think of each chakra as you press down, that speeds up the healing.
g> If you can chant the tones of each chakra as you press down, that is ideal.
h> Since the point is not open, it will be sore at first.
............If it gets too sore, stop and move on.

7> Do Acupressure Eye Point #2: FIRE by performing the following steps:

a> Blink four (4) times slowly so that you are conscious of what you are doing.
b> Place the tip of each thumb parallel with the bottom of each nostril.
c> Move the pad of each thumb up so that it rests on either side of the nose.
d> Your thumb must connect the bottom of the nostril with the middle of the nose.
e> Press down on your thumb in a massaging motion at least 7 times.
f> If you can think of each chakra as you press down, that speeds up the healing.
g> If you can chant the tones of each chakra as you press down, that is ideal.
h> Since the point is not open, it will be sore at first.
............If it gets too sore, stop and move on.

8> Do Acupressure Eye Point #3: EARTH by performing the following steps:

a> Blink four (4) times slowly so that you are conscious of what you are doing.
b> Place the tip of each thumb on the center point of each cheek bone.
c> It is down from the center of the eye and across from the middle of your nose.
d> Your thumb must be pressing against the cheek bone in the middle of the cheek.
e> Press down on your thumb in a massaging motion at least 7 times.
f> If you can think of each chakra as you press down, that speeds up the healing.
g> If you can chant the tones of each chakra as you press down, that is ideal.
h> Since the point is not open, it will be sore at first.
............If it gets too sore, stop and move on.

9> Do Acupressure Eye Point #4: WATER by performing the following steps:

a> Blink four (4) times slowly so that you are conscious of what you are doing.
b> Place the tip of each thumb on the inside corner of each eyebrow.
c> Press the tip of each thumb down on each one of your eyebrows.
d> Move your thumb slightly outward along your eyebrow and press down.
e> Press your thumb all along your eyebrow from the inside to the outside corner.
f> Once at the outside corner, move your thumb under your eye on the bone.
g> When done, you will have made a circle of your eye ending where you started.
i> Do this "ring around your eyeball" in a massaging motion at least 7 times.
j> If you can think of each chakra as you press down, that speeds up the healing.
k> If you can chant the tones of each chakra as you press down, that is ideal.
l> Since the point is not open, it will be sore at first.
............If it gets too sore, stop and move on.

10> Close this exercise by performing the following steps:

a> Blink four (4) times slowly so that you are conscious of what you are doing.
b> Say the following with emotion (that is if you really want to see):

Show me, universe, all that I need to see (past truth)
Show me, universe, all that I can be (present truth)
Show me, universe, all that I need to become" (future truth)

11> Again allow yourself to experience whatever it is that comes up for you. Often that will be greater insight. If it is insight then just let it flow. Remember not to judge the information you are getting until you have received it.

If you are concerned about what you are receiving, consult "Rules #8: 'Spirit-based' vs 'Ego-based' Guidance". Many times the insights we get are usually things "we already know" but have refused to "see" (the cause of our vision problem!).

12> It will take time for your eyes to adjust to your willingness to open them:
............LET IT!!

FOR THE ADVANCED ONLY: The "Tibetan Eye Cure"

True Story About the "Light" Cure: At one point in this lifetime, my eyes were so severely near sighted and so out of synch with one another that I was facing the very real possibility of blindness in one eye. For more, see "Heal With Me".

Of course, my "bad" eye was the right eye: the eye of intuition. It was so "bad" because I was seeing more about myself in past lives and I did not want to. My condition improved as I slowly began to reconnect with my skills and abilities.

I had a massive improvement in my sight when I went on a trip to Germany to confront the tangled web of karma that I had created there during many past lives. Further improvements came as I accepted and connected with who I had been in many past lives. The final improvement came when I followed Dr. Liberman's very sensible advice and "took off my glasses" so that I could really see!

 

 

We are now on to our Spirit's Basic Minimum Requirements,  I had skipped #5 because i had already posted that one in my blog awhile back.  For those that want to read it look back into my blogs it will be there.  # 5: Understanding and Healing the Human Energy Field.

So here we go  .

 

 

 

 

Cure #12: SEX! Now that I Have Your Attention: Here's How It Works

 

Having "A Piece of Heaven on Earth"

Everyone, everywhere, all the time - no matter what other issue they are working on - wants to know how to improve their sex life. I am tired of explaining it: so read it here and do not waste precious session time on it.

Know the Sex Code...

Sex was meant to be an experience that would put you in contact with the greater totality of yourself (see the depiction of this totality in the Jewish Kabbalistic Tree of Life on the left). So that you can understand the secret to great sex I am about to reveal, read the following passage on sex: Number 69 from "Hua Hu Ch'ing". Naturally, the Arabic number 69 is the numerical symbol for sex (look at it closely - you will get it - eventually).

The truth of sex is that:

"A person's approach to sexuality is a sign of their level of evolution.

Unevolved persons practice ordinary sexual intercourse placing all attention upon the sexual organs, they neglect the body's other organs and systems so that whatever physical energy is accumulated is summarily discharged the subtle energies are dissipated and disordered. It is a great leap backward.

For those who aspire to the higher realms of living, there is an angelic dual cultivation because every portion of the body, mind, and spirit (down to the cellular level) yearns for the integration of yin and yang angelic intercourse is lead by the spirit rather than the sexual organs.

Where ordinary sexual intercourse is full of effort,
........ angelic intercourse is calm, relaxed, quiet, and natural.
Where ordinary sexual intercourse unites sex organs with sex organs,
........ angelic intercourse unites body with body, mind with mind, spirit with spirit.

Ending not in dissolution but in integration, angelic intercourse is an opportunity for a man and a woman to mutually transform and uplift each other
........ into the realm of bliss and wholeness".

So How Does This Angelic Intercourse Work - You Ask

It starts with ordinary intercourse and works it's way up to angelic intercourse in 12 Stages. Note that most people settle for Stage 3 or 4 and do not advance beyond it. If the relationship sours, they drop back to Stage 2. Or they may go all the way back to Stage 1 where infidelity is inevitable

For Benjamin Franklin was right when he said, "Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage".

1> Stage 1: Ordinary - Any Part A Into Any Hole B: At this level, both the man and the woman are only seeking to gratify their mutual lust and discharge their accumulated desires for sex - anyone will do.

2> Stage 2: Ordinary - A Particular Part A Into A Particular Hole B: At this level, the man and the woman prefer to be with one another they start to become partners and do not want "just anyone". The energy begins to arc back and forth in a line between the man's penis and the woman's vagina.

3> Stage 3: Ordinary - Simple Pathway of Desire for Partner A and B: At this level, the desire starting in the man's brain travels through his heart before reaching his penis while the woman creates a path of desire from her heart to her vagina. The energy travels in a flat, thin "U" shape between them during sex.

4> Stage 4: Ordinary - Complex Pathway of Desire for Partner A and B: At this level, desire starting in the man's brain goes through his Heart, Solar Plexus, and Sacrum before going to his Root/Penis. The woman creates a path of desire going through her Heart, Solar Plexus, and Sacrum before going to her Root/ Vagina. The energy travels in a short, thick "U" shape between them during sex.

5> Stage 5: Ordinary - Advanced Pathway of Desire for Partner A and B: At this level, the desire starts in the man's Crown, going into his brain, travelling through all his Chakras, and out through his penis. His energy is received into the woman's vagina, joining her energy, travelling through all her Chakras, and out through her head. The energy travels in a tall "U" shape between them during sex.

6> Stage 6: Ordinary - Circular Pathway of Desire for Partner A and B: At this level, the desire starts in the man's Crown, going into his brain, travels through all his Chakras, and out through his penis. His energy is received into the woman's vagina, joining her energy, travels through all her Chakras, and out through her head. The energy becomes his then hers as it flows between them. The energy flows from her head back into his forming a thin, circular "O" path between them.

7> Stage 7: Angelic - Connected Pathway of Desire for Partner A and B: At this level, the circular pathway between the man and woman becomes a fusing and a merging of their energy. The energy flowing between them is his and hers and both. The energy forms a thick, circular "O" shaped path between them which runs in a continuous circle through their Chakras during their lovemaking.

8> Stage 8: Angelic - Connected Pathway of "Personality" Chakras for Partner A and B: At this level, the circular pathway between man and woman is so strong that it pushes out into their Personality Chakras. The Personality Chakras are the lower three: Root, Sacrum, and Solar Plexus. During sex, they become linked together in that order - the Root first, the Sacrum next, and the Solar Plexus last. The energy flows in a thick, circular "O" shaped path and also in straight lines directly between the Personality Chakras of both individuals. Energetically the bottom half of the "O" has three lines running through it.

9> Stage 9: Angelic - Connected Pathway of "Spiritual" Chakras for Partner A and B: At this level, the circular pathway between man and woman is so strong it pushes beyond the Personality Chakras out into the Spirituality Chakras. The Spirituality Chakras are the next three: Heart, Throat, and Third Eye. During sex, they become linked together in that order - the Heart first, the Throat next, and the Third Eye last - after the Personalities have connected. The energy flows in a thick, circular "O" shaped path and also in straight lines directly between the Personality and the Spirituality Chakras of both individuals. Energetically the "O" has six lines running through it with space at the top.

10> Stage 10: Angelic - Completely Linked Chakras for Partner A and B: At this level, the circular pathway between man and woman is so strong it pushes beyond the Spirituality Chakras into the Crown Chakra. The energy flows in a thick, circular "O" shaped path and in straight lines directly between the Chakras individuals. Energetically the "O" has seven very thick lines running through it.

11> Stage 11: Angelic - Completely Connected Chakras for Partner A and B: At this level, the Chakras of both individuals are completely fused together. There is no his and her energy: there is only us. The energy flows harmoniously in all directions. Energetically the "O" is completely filled in with energy.

12> Stage 12: Angelic - Completely Connected Energy for Partner A and B: At this level, the Chakras of both individuals are so strongly fused together that is pushes out into the Inner Energy Bodies of both individuals - literally, the two become one - the ultimate fulfillment of the bond of love. The energy flows everywhere instantaneously. Energetically the completely filled "O" keeps on expanding outward until both partners are fully linked at all levels.

NOW the CURE: How You Too Can Be Touched by Angelic Intercourse

It all begins with friendship "to have a friend, you have to be a friend". And so "to get more love, you need to be more love". You need to be more love - if not to all humanity - than to your sexual partner. The truth is sexual intercourse is the icing on the cake of relationship. The icing only tastes as good as the cake underneath it. In other words, it is the love in the relationship - outside of sexual intimacy - that determines the heights to which sexual intercourse between the partners can reach.

So if you want a better sex life, stop focusing on it...

Start learning how to add love to your daily routine. Speak many words of love. Give a small gift when it's not a special occasion. Do something for your partner that they really want done (especially if they know you do not want to do it!). Come home a bit early and spend some quality time with your partner. Kiss and hug your partner often. Come to see your partner as your soulmate. Let the two become one and you too will be touched by an angel.

 

 

 

Cure #20: "Gotta Get Me Some of That": The Attachment Cure

 

 What is Attachment?

Attachment is a signal from your Etheric (Intuition) Body that you still have desires within you that are seeking fulfillment in one or more physical incarnations. Usually this means there are issues that you have not been able to resolve successfully in one or more past lives. Your desires will pull you along the path of your lessons so that you can master them and advance in love, joy, and awareness as a spiritual being.

Emotions Closely Related to Attachment: Revenge, Regret, Guilt, Shame
Qualities Need to Resolve Attachment: Love, Detachment, Forgiveness
Energetic Sources: Etheric (Intuition) Body, Crown Chakra, Third Eye Chakra

What is Attachment Trying to Tell You (It's Spiritual Purpose)? The spiritual purpose of Attachment is to guide you into greater levels of spiritual unfoldment (growth in love, joy, and awareness). An individual becomes attached to what they desire. They desire what they have yet to achieve. They need to achieve mastery in different arenas of life so that they can become a fully realized spiritual being.

Underlying the desire for achievement is the quest to become a "better" CoWorker with God. "Every day in every way" we do become better and better at becoming "more" of who we already are… and we are coworkers with God. The true goal is "continuous improvement": becoming even better at what we do and who we are.

How NOT to Respond to Attachment: There is a fine line between the need to attach to an experience in order to explore it… and the desire to be totally obsessed by it. One of the risks of exploring one's past lives is to become lost in them, especially if we perceive that our past lives are "somehow better than" the life that we are living now. In such cases, we may decide to take actions - based on that knowledge - which are totally inappropriate in the context of our present life.

The point of all past life healing is to live our lives today as fully and as richly as we can by coming to peace with unresolved issues from past lives manifesting in our lives now. The worst thing we can do is to let our past life attachments derail us from growing today: physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually.

How TO Respond to Attachment - The Attachment Cure:

"In desire is man born; from desire he consumes objects of various tastes; by desire is he led away bound… bound by evil qualities he is chastised" (Adi Granth). Knowing that, while in human flesh, we are bound by our desires is the first step to becoming free from them. For once we can see the desire, we can understand it and through understanding master it.

"Establish in us O God that which Thou hast wrought, and perfect the work which Thou hast begun in us to Thy glory." (Martin Luther) At the end of all our karma, we finally make perfect the perfection which God has created inside us. Until we connect with our perfection, we get drawn back into this world by the attachments which imperfections create. Detachment, the desireless state which Eastern religions believe is nirvana, is the key to leaving this world for good.

Below are some of the more commonly experienced attachments along with the underlying spiritual issues and their "cure". These cures include: 1> Physical Attachments, 2> Mental Attachments, and 3> Emotional Attachments.

Attachment Cure Part 1: Cures for Physical Attachments include:* Physical - Obsession: The strongest of all attachments is obsession. Obsession is what lies "between madness and desire" and is so deeply ingrained in us that it becomes part of our cellular memory. It pulls us back into life after life until we are no longer obsessed with the person, place, or thing captivating our attention.

The only cure for the obsession is to devote so much attention to it that we become "sick of it". That is the reason why people choose to come into agreement with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) in any given lifetime. By focusing so much attention on their obsession, they will derail their life now "for no apparent reason".

The inevitable damage caused by their obsession will motivate them to end it. This will enable them to move past the source of their desire so that they can move forward freely in the trail of their future incarnations. So have compassion for the obsessed for they are wrestling with lifetimes of problems.

* Physical - Sensuality: From a karmic standpoint, laziness is the central problem of human existence. The truth is most people are not the actors in their life's drama but the reactors to circumstances in their lives which require action to be taken. They become driven by their "senses": sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell.

The need to avoid pain and the desire to experience pleasure are largely motivated by the senses. For example, most people get jobs, not out of a genuine desire to help others, but because they do not wish to live out of doors becoming subject to the elements and predators there. They only marry to satisfy desires for love, companionship, support, and sex etc. It becomes all too easy to overindulge the senses and to drown in the quest to satisfy them. Breaking the attachment to sensuality usually comes only after lifetimes of experience. When you "have been there and done that", you can detach from the attachment to your senses.

* Physical - Laziness: Human laziness has both spiritual and biological causes. The spiritual cause is the distant memory of when we all were one in the blissful, unmanifested mass consciousness of the universe. This was before we all were dumped into the worlds of karma - which forced us to take action - and reincarnation - which forces us to come back until we can act with total responsibility from the place of unconditional love. The biological cause is the tendency to seize upon opportunities for rest whenever they present themselves.

For most of human history, this was absolutely necessary for survival because the universe was a stressful, hostile place. Yet in environments of relative ease, laziness slows our progress and actually contributes to making us "worse off" physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Our bodies were meant to move just as our minds were meant to think, our emotions were meant to be acknowledged, and our spirits were meant to soar. The only cure for laziness is to get up, go out, and live!

* Physical - Envy: Envy is always caused by misplaced attention. You envy in others what you use to have in a past life or what you have yet to create in a future life. Since all time is now, resonances manifesting as envy in the present life are created when you catch glimpses of your past or future self in another's experience.

Envy is the failure to realize that, along our journey of Soul in the universe, we have been and will be all things. For when we envy others, we tell ourselves that we are not good enough. For when we want the gifts that others have, it means we cannot appreciate the gifts that we have been given now. It means we cannot truly love ourselves. Envy is a poison that will sicken us until it is purged. The cure for envy is found when we connect with the totality of ourselves and know that all is within us now. Knowing that we are complete means there is never a reason to envy others.

Attachment Cure Part 2: Cures for Mental Attachments include:* Mental - Intolerance: Of all past life attachments, those involving rigid, fanatical intolerance - "good-or-evil" beliefs, "we-or-they" attitudes, and "black-or-white" thinking - are among the hardest to heal. What it takes are lifetimes of experiencing things from all viewpoints to come to the truth that "we have looked into the face of the enemy and find that we are they…"

So if you cannot stand some group - race, sex, religion, sect, creed, nation - your intolerance will keep you spinning on the wheel of reincarnation until you can. The cure for intolerance is the sure and certain knowledge that - after we have gone through many lifetimes and have at one time been all things. Knowing that we are all things means there is never a reason to be intolerant.

* Mental - Hate: If left unhealed for too long, intolerance and it's companion, unforgiveness, manifest as the most extreme form of past life attachment: hate. Hate is THE most difficult past life attachment of all to heal. For hate is like fire: it can fuel itself indefinitely on everything it finds around it. Since we are infinite beings, vowing to hate forever is a command to the universe that can be carried out for millenia. What eventually cures hate is the heavy price it carries as we make our long journey as Soul. For hate is as surely a poison to the body at all levels - physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually - as love is a tonic.

Hating is like taking poison and expecting someone else to die because what you truly wish for others is what you will attract to yourself. It is you who will "suffer and die": is that what you want? Do you want to keep coming back... then keep on hating for it is a guaranteed ticket back here! For until you can fully embrace what it is that you hate, you will never fully share in God's love. For all that exist are created by God to serve his purposes in the unfolding majesty of His Creation. That is why so many religions teach "love your enemy as yourself" not so much for the good it does your enemy… but for the ultimate good that it does for you.

* Mental - Failure: The hardest thing you will ever have to accept about your life in the universe is that you have chosen to be here. Almost always, the choice was made because there is something that you "HAVE TO" do, be, or have. Often, what we have to do, be, or have is to attempt to correct our perceived "failures" in our "performance" in one or more previous lives. "Failure" is a value judgment and an interpretation that we place on how events unfolded in our past.

In a perfectly evolving universe, there are no such things as failures. Instead there are only alternative paths that we chose to pursue. The cure to "feeling like a failure" is just the knowledge that we did not "fail" so much as we chose to go in another direction than the one we originally intended. As the most successful business people will tell one, each "failure" (how the event actually unfolded) brings you one step closer to "success" (how you want the event to unfold for you).

* Mental - Success: If the Earth can with a warning label it would be this: "Do not enter here unless you are prepared to triumph over adversity". Ironically, this is why most people come to the Earth: so that they can see how they will measure up to the ultimate tests of discipline this planet has to offer. For it is success more that failure that keeps us coming back for more incarnations. "Success" is also a value judgment and an interpretation that we place on how events unfolded in our past.

In a perfectly evolving universe, there are no such things as successes. Instead there are only alternative paths that we chose to pursue that align with our intentions, statements, and actions toward a manifested goal. The cure to "getting more and even more success" is to have as much as you want… until you have had your fill and decide to move on... to "bigger and better" things.

Attachment Cure Part 3: Cures for Emotional Attachments include:* Emotional - Guilt: "O Lord, for the actions that we have taken, please forgive us" is the often recited prayer about those things we feel "guilty" about having done. In a universe where all happens by agreement, guilt is not necessary. Before we came into this life, we agreed to do all that we did, are doing, and will do. Others we are "doing it to" also agreed… or it would not have been allowed to happen.

So, from a karmic standpoint, the purpose of guilt is to motivate us to continuously improve our conduct as spiritually realized beings. The cure for guilt is not to live in anguish over past actions but rather to "get it right the next time" those same lessons come around… for if we have not gotten it right, those lessons will crop up again.

* Emotional - Regret: "O Lord, for the actions that we should have taken but did not, please forgive us" is the often recited prayer about those things we "regret" not doing. In a universe where all happens by agreement, regret is not necessary.

Regret is usually harder to overcome than guilt. That is because regret is usually "powered" by laziness. For it is always easy to stand by, watch a thing being done, and do nothing than it is to get involved and take some - right or wrong - action. From a karmic standpoint, the purpose of regret is not to live in anguish over past inactions but rather to "get it right the next time" those same lessons come around… for if we have not gotten it right, those lessons will crop up again.

* Emotional - Revenge: "Vengeance is mine saith the Lord." English translation: you need not be concerned about "how others wronged you" because in a just and perfect universe, the Lords of Karma will see to it that whatever "wrongs" were "committed against you" will be "righted" in future incarnation(s).

In a universe where everything happens by prior agreement, there is no need for revenge. For in one life, we agreed to play the "victim" and in another, we agreed to play the "victimizer". We chose those experiences for the lessons that they had to teach us. Yet the desire for revenge is among the strongest attachments that pull us along the path of our karma. The only cure is to go through the cycle of revenge until you realize how utterly useless it is.

* Emotional - Shame: Hanging around the universe through many past lives, a person can get very beaten up. This can manifest in today's life as a sense of extreme shame. This shame can take many forms: self criticism, self loathing, self injury, and so on. Extreme shame is the result of your unconscious mind trying to keep you from repeating mistakes that you made in past lives.

Yet extreme shame is counter productive because it is very likely keeping you from fully enjoying your life or experiencing true inner peace. The only cure for extreme shame are massive doses of self love and self esteem. Remember that the one thing God does not make is junk. You are perfect just as He made you and there is no need for shame. So love yourself as He does... and all will be well.

Cure #19: "How Great I Art - Not!": The Vanity Cure

 What is Vanity?

Vanity is a signal from your Mental (Thought) Body that you are out of balance with your "proper" place in the universe. Vanity arises whenever the "will-ego" and the "conscience-Soul" are severely out of balance - in both directions. Either someone thinks they are "God's gift" to the universe (narcissistic vanity) or that they are "God's mistake" (masochistic vanity) - neither of which are really true.

Emotions Closely Related to Vanity: Pride, Shame, Loneliness, Procrastination
Qualities Need to Resolve Vanity: Love, Humility, Self Esteem, Inner Peace
Energetic Sources: Mental (Thought) Body, Throat Chakra

What is Vanity Trying to Tell You (It's Spiritual Purpose)? The spiritual purpose of Vanity is to balance the two tracks along with we live out our many lives as Soul in the universe.

The first track is our individual journey as Soul through the universe (karma) so we can become fully Self Realized.

The second track is our continuous connection to the God Source (known as our Higher Self) and the collective consciousness so we can become fully God Realized.

Vanity is the result when these two tracks are out of balance: creating either excessive pride (narcissistic vanity) or excessive meekness (masochistic vanity).

How NOT to Respond to Vanity: The most important thing in responding to vanity is to remember that it is a signal, like pain in your physical body, that is trying to tell you are out of balance. The worst thing you can do is to move from the center and seek either of the extremes of vanity: pride or meekness.

In narcissistic vanity ("how truly great I art"), the will and the conscience are imbalanced in the direction of a person believing that they are the universe instead of just having a place in it. Pride is the vanity imbalance that results when the needs of the individual are always put ahead of the needs of the collective universe.

In masochistic vanity ("what a miserable bag of dung I am"), the will and the conscience are imbalanced in the direction of a person falsely believing they have no place in the universe. Meekness is the vanity imbalance that results when the needs of the collective universe are always put ahead of the needs of the individual.

Excessive pride inevitably leads to an individual being "burned up" while excessive meekness inevitably leads to an individual being "burned out". By the counter tension of these opposite forces, the individual comes to a place of humility where honoring oneself and the universe can be properly balanced.

How TO Respond to Vanity - The Vanity Cure: "All life embodies the yin (meekness) and embraces the yang (pride) through their union achieving harmony." For pride teaches us how to be strong and meekness teaches us how to be compassionate and by tempering our power with love we grow to be fully realized beings. Some life experiences will tear down our pride while others will puff up our meekness so we can become - in the end - true humility.

Here are some common "vanity traps" and how best to cure the related imbalances: 1> Cures for Narcissistic Vanity, 2> Cures for Masochistic Vanity, as well as how to 3> Achieve Balanced Humility.

Vanity Cure Part 1: Curing Narcissistic Vanity include the following:

* Evaluation - Active Listening: Since the only opinion that the narcissist values is their own, they rarely listen to - let alone consider - the opinions of others. Yet if the narcissist is honest with themselves, they will have noticed recurring patterns in the feedback that others give them about their behavior. The best and quickest way for the narcissist to start correcting their behavior is to actively listen to others.

Active listening is more than "hearing" what the other person has to say. It is asking questions about what the person has to say in a sincere effort to discern precisely how their narcissistic actions are so hurtful to others. As the saying goes: "Would to God the gift He gives us, to see ourselves as others see us". For if the narcissist could do so, they would see how destructive their behavior is - not just to others - but to themselves karmically as they reincarnate over many lifetimes.

* Evaluation - Implementing Feedback: Seeking and listening to feedback will do the narcissist no good unless they decide to act on it and change their behavior "for the better". This is where the real problem lies for the narcissist. For making a change (whether great or small) implies that the narcissist has been two things they "cannot stand": imperfect (something is actually wrong with "them") and at fault ("they" actually were wrong, weak, or inferior somehow).

Worse, implementing feedback involves personal transformation which is often perceived as a "triple threat". First, change means the narcissist must "compromise" their "unique and special" identity which has been created as a carefully cultivated defense against the world. Second, they will feel that by making changes they have become "subservient" to "lesser beings". Third, change means they will have to face and heal the pain which caused them to adopt a narcissist defense in the first place.

* Evaluation - Reaching Back: Narcissists always leave a long trail of dead relationships - whether it be with family, friends, spouses, or coworkers - in their wake. For people who cannot meet the never ending demands of the narcissist for attention, validation, and support either leave in disgust or are banished from their universe by the narcissist. Often the best chance that the narcissist has to improve is to "reach back" to those who they used to know and ask for help.

Those who the narcissist have "wronged" by past behavior will be delighted to share their opinions and - sometimes - will even be willing to help them in their recovery. And even if reaching back does not achieve the desired results, it will impress the Lords of Karma with the fact that the narcissist has tried to change and grow beyond the self defeating behaviors that no longer serve them.

* Evaluation - Valuing Others: Narcissism can only be cured when the narcissist learns to value and respect others in the same way that they value themselves. To begin this process, the narcissist needs to take an inventory of all the people in their life and decide who on this list are the most essential to their happiness.

For each of these essential people, the narcissist must list 33 things about the other person which they genuinely admire. This list cannot include items that relate to the narcissist as in how this person "helped them" or what this person "gave to them" or how this person "flatters them" or why this person "is like them", etc. Seeing the value in others is the truest sign that the narcissist is beginning to see past their own needs, wants, and desires and is the only true cure for narcissistic vanity.

Vanity Cure Part 2: Curing Masochistic Vanity include the following:

* Appreciation - Self Esteem Tape: Masochism should be defined as any instance where you are unable to honor or value yourself and, by failing to do so, you are hurt - physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually. The traditional term - "lack of self esteem" - is just too mild to really capture the harm that having no sense of self worth can do to a person. As the saying goes, "If I am not for myself, who will be for me?" Often the answer is "no one".

And yet, if you do have others in your life who are "for you", then one of the most powerful ways they can show you this is by participating in creating a "Self Esteem" Tape for you. Have your "champions" record - without you being present - a short message about what they like best about you. The only rule is that their message must be positive and uplifting. If there is even the slightest thing on the tape that is negative or uncomplimentary about you, edit it out. Play that tape over and over again until you too can believe in all the wonderful things others already see in you.

* Appreciation - Positive Self Inventory: So often masochists suffer from the "Swiss Cheese" Syndrome. This is where compliments and positives messages fly through the "holes" in our swiss cheesed memory and are "lost and gone forever". While criticisms and negative message slam against the sides of the swiss cheese and stay embedded in our memory forever.

The "Positive Self Inventory" is designed to reverse this process. To do it, you simply fill in the blanks of the following incomplete sentences by giving only positive answers about yourself.

As in "I like myself because ___."
And "The thing I do best is ___."
And "My best quality is ___."
And "My special talent is ___."
And "I feel proud when I ___."
And "I feel powerful when ___."
And "The most important thing to know about me is ___."
And "What makes me unique is ___."
And "The thing I like best about myself is ___."
And "God loves me because ___."
And "I love myself because ___."
And "If I was introduced to someone new, the first great thing they would notice about me is ___."

* Appreciation - Getting Vitamins J & L: Those suffering from "Low Self Esteem" always have a shortage of Vitamins J (Joy) & L (Love). Make no mistake: joy and love are as essential nutrients for the proper functioning of body and mind as any other "vitamin or mineral". The good news is that joy and love are things that we can freely give ourselves. And we are the only ones who can know what it is that truly makes us feel totally joyful and loved.

The best part of all is that we can start giving ourselves joy and love right now at this minute: no need to leave the house, visit the doctor, and spend lots of money. To make this work, we have to give ourselves Vitamins J & L every day, day after day, for at least 15 minutes a day. Accept no substitutes and allow nothing to interfere with these Vitamins… your life depends on it!

* Appreciation - Annual Performance Review: There is no reason to wait until your life review to assess your life's progress. At least once a year (or whenever you are getting down on yourself) take out a piece of paper and write about how you believe you did as a person during the past year. Write in the third person using your name (ie. I would write "Ellen helped… or did…" etc).

This review can only include items about your "performance" that are positive and complimentary. Be sure to include those items where you received a "thank you" from others, where you made someone else smile, where you feel that you "made a difference" in the positive resolution of a situation and so on. So often in the daily busyness of our lives, we can lose track of the good that we do in our lives… the Annual Performance Review will remind us of this!

Vanity Cure Part 3: Achieving Balanced Humility include the following:

* Centering - Physically: Balanced humility is the state where we value ourselves knowing that we are divine creations but we know that our purpose is to serve all life with love. An essential component of valuing ourselves is honoring the body and mind that is our vehicle in this life. The human body was made to flow (receive and give) love unconditionally (in fact, the human body suffers greatly without love).

Touch is an essential part of flowing love to ourselves and others and centering ourselves in balanced humility. When we are babies we instinctively know this truth and demand to be touched by a variety of other people everyday. Touch connects us as babies to life. It is touch that we are really craving from our romantic partners. It is this touch which sustains our bodies in vibrant health. The Reiki Heart Anchor is how we touch our hearts to center ourselves in love. It connects us the essential truth of our existence: "we receive love, we give love, we are love."

* Centering - Mentally: At every moment, we are choosing either life or death. We choose life when we honor ourselves by making empowering choices, by having life affirming emotions, and by seeing ourselves "positively". When we do not, we are choosing death. By our choices in life, we can be our own best friend or worst enemy. It begins inside with the beliefs and thoughts we choose.

Our beliefs and thoughts manifest as self talk - the internal dialogue we have running in our minds - which will either empower us to master life or limit us to being life's slave. Running the Gauntlet will show us whether or not our beliefs and thoughts are empowering us into achieving a state of balanced humility.

* Centering - Emotionally: Love is the most powerful force in the universe. It is the magic universal solvent which cuts through all hate, all fears, all problems, all obstacles, all difficulties. The basis for all love is love of self. As you love yourself more, you love others more. As you love others more, you love yourself more.

Love is the only things that is boundless and timeless - it is the beginning and the ending, the alpha and the omerga, of the universe. For any question, love is the answer - it is living Loving Kindness that brings us into balanced humility.

* Centering - Spiritually: Dare to live your life holistically. In the words of "Hua Hu Ch'ing" (Lao Tse), "join your body, mind, and spirit in all you do. Make choices accord with nature. Rely on yourself. Allow your work and your recreation to be one and the same. Do exercise that develops your whole being. Listen to music that bridges your body, mind, and spirit. Serve others while cultivating yourself."

"Understand that true growth comes from meeting and solving the problems of life in a way that is harmonizing to yourself and others. If you can follow these simple old ways, you will be renewed." Follow these simple old ways and you will enter into a state of balanced humility with ease.

 

 

Cure #18: "Can Never Get Enough": The Greed Cure

 

 What is Greed?

Greed is a signal from your Causal (Karmic) Body that you have unhealed survival traumas from one or more past lives. For most of human history, humans have "suffered" greatly from poverty and from the "zero sum game" mentality ("for me to have more, you must have less"). Traumatic deaths caused by disputes over money in past lives, deeply ingrained in the cellular memory, are the wellspring of greed.

Emotions Closely Related to Greed: Hurt, Sad, Anxiety, Depression, Phobia
Qualities Need to Resolve Greed: Love, Charity, Contentment, Trust
Energetic Sources: Causal (Karmic) Body, Solar Plexus Chakra, Sacral Chakra

What is Greed Trying to Tell You (It's Spiritual Purpose)? The spiritual purpose of Greed is to motivate individuals to become the best that they can be so that they can manifest greater levels of abundance in the universe. Manifesting support is far more than attracting money, it also includes manifesting the energy, the time, the space, the helpful people, the tools and resources which are needed to fulfill one's life purpose. The trick to mastering greed is to manifest such things that in a healthy, balanced way, that is "win, win" for all concerned. For it is the "dark and easy" path to manifest abundance where you win and others lose.

How NOT to Respond to Greed: The worst thing you can do is to give into the dark side of greed. Greed is very much a double edged sword.

Greed can be good when it motivates us to do our best to serve others to the best of our ability so that we can get the rewards that come along with it (ie. money, recognition, status, etc).

Greed is bad when in our "drive to get ahead", we decide to check our heart, brains, and integrity at the door of our blind ambition. From the universal perspective, it is more important to be human than to be "important". For when we pass from one life to the next, we realize how "fleeting" our achievements, fame, and fortune are and we learn the terrible price greed often has us paying karmically in future lives.

How TO Respond to Greed - The Greed Cure: "What you do to the least of my children is what you do to your Creator" " is the attitude that will most often cut the greed signal off at the source. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" is the unfailing light that guides an open, loving heart safely through the treacherous, murky, and rocky waters of greed.

Put yourself on the other side of everything you do and ask yourself:

    * "If I were this other person, how would I like to be treated?"
    * "In this situation, what would I expect / want from me?"
    * "Would I be happy with what I am doing for the other person?"

If the answers to those questions fill you with pride and not shame, then you are most likely "doing the right - greed free - thing.

Here are some common "greed traps" and how best to avoid the often heavy karmic penalties associated with 1> Misusing Money, 2> Misdirecting Attention, and 3> Misappropriating Gifts.

Greed Cure Part 1: Cures for Misusing Money include the following:* Money - Get Rich Quick Scams: In the physical world, if you have a relationship with nothing else, you will have a relationship with money. If you want to know the secret to making money in any venture it is this: "that you get what you want from life by helping others get what they want from life". It is just that simple.

Those who serve the most people get the most money. Look around and you will see that the most successful businesses are those which offer a superior product, at attractive prices, with great customer support, and a genuine commitment to customer satisfaction. Some have done this quickly, some have done it slowly but those who last have done it honestly (by not cheating or being cheated). So note the differences between "legitimate business ventures" and "get rich quick scams":

Get Rich Quick Scams have the following characteristics:

"Startup company, exploding opportunity, must act now" usually means that the scam is just being setup so the first ones in the door have the chance to bilk the others who come in later. And after the first cash is skimmed the start up operators are nowhere to be found.

"Guaranteed downline, matrix payout, cannot lose" usually is the hallmark of the con artists reeling in the greedy. The truth is that Network Marketing / Multi-Level Marketing (MLM) can be an effective tool to get products out to the marketplace. Yet too often MLMs exist to peddle garbage in a get rich quick scheme where the only people who make money are the first in the door and they make their money by recruiting the greedy to snap up and pass off the junk.

"Amazing new product, breakthrough discovery" with fantastic, "too-good-to-be-true" claims often are just that - too good to be true. If you like the product offered, if it is something that you would use yourself and would recommend to loved ones, friends, and family, see if it sells. If it indeed helps people and provides value for money... if it makes the world a better place to live in and people happier to live there… see if it continues to sell. If you do not see a product that is being marketed, then run fast and run far, because it is a total scam.

"No work, no selling, just run ads" are also those which tell you "a one time setup fee" is required. That is when you know that the outfit is making money from the setup fee and once you are in, you will be expected to "profit" the same way. So if you cannot get passionate about the product offered or feel "wrong about it" in any way, then spirit is telling you to pass on it. So you need to search your heart for the "right thing to do" and you will find the answer there.

"Erase Bad Credit" is a myth. If you have defaulted on a loan, made late payments, or "paid as agreed", it stays on your credit report for seven years. Bankruptcy remains on your credit report for ten years. There is no such thing as "credit repair" for financial karma. Only time and good spending habits will repair a damaged credit report and anyone who tells you otherwise is simply wrong.

Other signs of scams are "You've Won the Grand Prize", "Get Paid to Watch TV and Mail from Home", "Work from Home Business Runs Itself, No Work"… if it sounds to good to be true, it is.

"Get Rich Quick Scams" really are nothing more than "get more karma quick schemes". The universe is not fooled… when you try to fool others, you get the karma. There is only one cure from "Get Rich Quick" urges and that is to "Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow!" Use your special talent and do what makes your heart sing: for those that succeed the most link their motivation to love.

This is a logical proposition: if love is the most powerful force in the universe and if it is strongly linked to a money making goal, then that goal will be fulfilled abundantly and the money will flow like water!

* Money - Theft: Those who make a living by stealing are under the illusion that it is a much easier way of life. Most thieves eventually do get caught for one simple reason: they cannot stop stealing. Since they do not value what they are getting - because they have not "earned it by honest labor" - they tend to waste it… figuring "there is more where that came from". So that means that they must steal again.

The more they steal, the more they are prone to making the mistakes that will attract the attention of law enforcement. Sooner or later they will "trip" themselves up and "get caught stealing". The tragedy is that many career thieves could put their creative thinking and resourcefulness to use in high paying jobs. The cure to theft is to realize that you always pay for it… if not in this life then in a future one.

* Money - Hoarding: Those who hoard are living under the illusion that we do not live in an abundant universe. Since famine and blight are "just around the corner", hoarders must "hang onto what they got". The problem with hoarding is that it creates the condition that the hoarder is trying to prevent: scarcity and lack.

Abundance is a circular flow of giving and receiving that gets shut down when one receives and refuses to give. Letting go of the old is the only way that new can come into your life. Hoarding is almost always the result of one of more past lives where scarcity and lack were the direct cause of illness or death of oneself or loved ones. Past life healing is the best cure for the need to hoard - especially for those extreme cases where it has been diagnosed as Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder.

* Money - Cutting Corners: Cutting corners is often a compromise of the desire to steal and hoard. Those who "cut corners" are stealing because they are "giving the minimum and getting the maximum". They are hoarding because they stretch materials to their breaking point rather than to supply what is truly needed. Like thieves, those who cut corners eventually get caught because they cannot stop. They are convinced that "no one notices" and so they will "get away with it".

Even if they "get away with it" in one life, they are certain to pay for it in another. The truth is that there are no innocent victims of scams - those who are "ripped off" are paying a debt in true coin to those they "ripped off" in past lives. The only cure for cutting corners is to "smile and do right for you are on Karmic Camera!"

Greed Cure Part 2: Cures for Misdirecting Attention include the following:* Attention - Time Hogs: Time is the most valuable commodity that each of us has. It levels the playing field of life - for no one gets anymore time in a day than anyone else. "Time Hogs" are those who value their time and actively conserve it at the expense of yours by employing one or more of the following strategies.

They usually insist you come a half hour early so they do not have to wait for you. They usually keep you waiting because they are always "running behind". They "forget" to do what they have promised so you spend your time doing it instead.

There is only one remedy for "Time Hogs" - that it is pull away the trough of your time. Find out when things start and decide when you want to arrive there. If the hog is late, wait five minutes and leave without them. If they cannot keep their promises, pull away from them… your time is too valuable to waste on hogs.

* Attention - Space Hogs Personal space is like a territory that must be defended… for if it is not people will overrun it. All it takes often is to tell the "invaders" - politely but firmly - that they have crossed into your territory and that the intrusion is unwelcome. Space Hoggery takes many forms as in:

- "Do not call me on Saturday mornings because that is when I sleep in".
- Or "you are standing too close to me, please take a step back". Thanks.
- Or "it is my time to be quiet now, children, please go to your room and play".
- Or "your perfume is overwhelming, please move farther away". (If someone "stinks" no one would put up with it but choking on cologne is socially acceptable).
- Or "I do not permit smoking in my home, if you need to take a cigarette break, please take it outside" (smoking IS air pollution, make no mistake about it).
- Or "please turn down your music, it is quite loud and I cannot hear the person on the other end of the phone" (there is such a thing as noise pollution too).

So often people suffer in silence from "Space Hogs" who often will just "cut it out" if you ask them politely. People may surprise you with their consideration.

* Attention - Prima Donnas: "Prima Donnas" are people who are time, space, and attention hogs all rolled into one. They must always be "the first, the best, and the only". In the world view of the "Prima Donna", they are the only first class citizens, the people who they choose to honor with their presence are second class citizens, and the rest do not merit consideration. The first thing to remember about Prima Donnas is that "they put their pants on one leg at a time, like the rest of us".

The easiest way to break the spell of the Prima Donna is to imagine their private moments in the bathroom performing necessary bodily functions. The truth is the world is a stage and all of us are only players. If some of us have roles that others think are better, remember this: that all are equally loved in the sight of God from the "crack whore" to "Mother Teresa" and in His Sight there are no Prima Donnas.

* Attention - Drain People: "Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" are basic human rights that no one has the right to take from you. "Drain people" are those who seek to deprive you of these rights by being consistently greedy with your time, attention, money, happiness, and peace of mind. So often individuals put up with "Drain People" because "they are my mother, father, sister, brother, husband, wife, child, relative, boss, coworker…" and so on.

Never forget that all these people - whatever other relation they have to you in your life now - in the larger scheme of things are merely your partners in karma. As partners in karma, they have agreed to meet you in this life so that you and they could grow in love, joy, and awareness. If they cannot help you to do this, if they choose to "drain" you of your well being and vitality, then you need to let them go with love and pursue other options… here's how.

- If parents are draining you, learn to become your parent by nurturing yourself.
- If siblings are draining you, cultivate close friends who support and honor you.
- If spouses are draining you, insist on being championed by your partner in life.
- If children are draining you, set realistic limits and then lovingly enforce the rules.
- If relatives are draining you, say they must act like family or depart like strangers.
- If bosses are draining you, take the steps in the proper order to protect yourself.
- If jobs are draining you, then find a job that will empower you… it's your life!

Greed Cure Part 3: Cures for Misappropriating Gifts include the following:* Gifts - Disability: Before the advent of disability, the physical world was a very harsh place for those who were seriously disabled in body, mind, emotions, and/or spirit. It is a highly compassionate and loving universe that provides a safety net for those - who by "accident or illness" - become unable to support themselves by working. Most of the people who are on disability are truly deserving of this gift.

Yet there are many who seek to "beat the system" by dipping into the "disability bucket". Like thieves, they believe that "the world owes them a living". So they take a "free ride" on the disability train. Yet the universe is above all about justice… and those who are "disability cheats" in one life will pay the price in future lives. Often they will reincarnate with disabilities where they will not be supported. The cure for "disability cheats" is to know that their karma will come due for repayment in full.

* Gifts - Welfare: Like disability, welfare is a gift from the universe to help those "down on their luck" get a chance to "get back on their feet" and become self supporting members of society. The truth is that - along with love, joy, and awareness - we are here to learn to be self sufficient, self supporting, and self reliant. To the extent that individuals use welfare to avoid becoming self sustaining is the extent to which they are misappropriating these gifts of the universe.

If those on welfare, do not take this gifts to help themselves out of self dependence, they will reincarnate into situations where they will "sink or swim" without the benefit of help. There are pits of karma all over the Earth for a reason - those who cannot learn life mastery by gentle means will learn by harsh ones. The real cure for "welfare cheats" to know that their karma will come due for repayment with future lives of great difficulty… when it could have been so much easier. As always, the path that Soul receives for it's growth it always It's own choice.

* Gifts - Entitlements: Entitlements, like disability, welfare, pensions, and so on, are "illusions of security". Security does not exist in nature - the world is an ever changing stage of karma - and if the government or companies who are "giving" the entitlements ever ceased, people would learn that there is only one true entitlement in life. That entitlement is your experience - what you have learned, how you have grown, who you have known, and what you have done with your life.

It is the personal qualities developed on your journey through the universe that are the source of your abundance and of your survival in any of the worlds of God whether on Earth or in "heaven". This is what is meant by the words" lay up for your treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." (Matthew 6:20-21) Remember that gifts that are given can be taken away… there are really no such things as entitlements. "Taking only what you need" in any life ensures that you "will always have whatever it is that you want".

* Gifts - Reparations: Since nothing happens in the universe except by prior agreement, there is never really any need for reparations (money damages given to a person as compensation for "wrongs" done by another). Yet reparations do send the correct message of universal justice when "victims" in one life are compensated for earlier wrongs because the link between cause and effect is clear.

Although the giving and receiving of reparations are part of the karmic equation, the trend of "historical reparations" is a total scam. Not only is it a misappropriation of the gifts of the universe, it is a misuse of money and misdirection of attention both better spent on solving current problems. The only comfort here is that "the mills of the Gods do grind slowly and with exactness grinds" even the reparation mongers!

 

 

 

 

Cure #17: "Living with the Dragon": The Anger Cure What is Anger? Anger is a signal from your Astral (Emotional) Body that an important personal boundary has been violated. Since anger is the guardian of emotions (Energy in Motion ), it often is like the great winged dragon that put us on it's back and flies away out of our control for awhile. It carries us along for awhile until, weary of our ride through the whirlwind, we stop because we have spent all our emotional energy. Emotions Closely Related to Anger: Impatience, Annoyance, Rage Qualities Need to Resolve Anger: Love, Forgiveness, Tolerance, Compassion Energetic Sources: Astral (Emotional) Body, Heart Chakra What is Anger Trying to Tell You (It's Spiritual Purpose)? The spiritual purpose of Anger is twofold. First, anger signals that some action is needed. Second, it teaches you to manage the actions flowing from your emotions. From the "emotional" actions that you take, you will either resolve the karmic issues flowing from the situation or you will create more karma to be resolved in future. For if you try to deny your anger, it will turn inward, causing anxiety, depression, hypertension, and potentially self destructive behaviors. Yet if you indulge your anger, turning it outward without "moderating", you may take actions you will be sorry for later (as in "committing "crimes of passion" or saying things that "cannot be taken back"). How NOT to Respond to Anger: The most important thing in responding to anger is to remember that it is a signal, like pain in your physical body, that is trying to tell you action must be taken. Whatever action you take based upon the anger signal is something that you decide to do. Many people get so caught up in the anger that they simply pass it on… dumping it full force on whoever "caused it". Although anger at times is an effective tool in dealing with difficult situations, if used too often, it loses impact. For if you are always angry, no one can tell the difference between when it is "real" and when it is just a "knee jerk" reaction. So they will tend not to take you seriously if you are always angry... compounding your frustration. How TO Respond to Anger - The Anger Cure: "Forgive them, God, for they know not what they do" is the attitude that will most often cut the anger signal off at the source. The first step in the journey toward forgiveness is the realization that anger is most often born out of ignorance. * Often anger comes because you are unaware of all the facts or are misinformed. * Or you have false judgments or unrealistic expectations about the situation. * Or you are really angry with yourself but are taking it out on someone else. * Or the anger relates to unresolved past pain and not to what "caused" it now. * Or the anger is 100% justified based upon what others "did or did not do". The final step in the journey towards forgiveness is to routinely practice "better responses to anger". These better responses include: 1> Cultivating Calmness, 2> Resourceful Redirection, and 3> Appropriate Asserting. Anger Cure Part 1: Cultivating Calmness is done by using these techniques: * Relaxation - Breaths: The quickest way to relax is by taking deep breaths to bring more life force into your body and thereby balance your heart rate, blood pressure, hormones, and adrenaline elevated by the anger response. This will calm your physical and emotional bodies allowing you to think more clearly. See the "Breath Cure" for the "belly breaths" (breathing from your stomach not from your chest) that will infuse your being with calmness, peace, and centeredness. * Relaxation - Self Talk: Often the fastest cure for anger is "talk yourself out of it". That is done by saying to yourself silently or out loud "Relax", "Calm Down", "Take it Easy", and so on. Put your fingers to your heart and feel your heart slow it's pounding as you cultivation the relaxation response. If you have the time, do the Reiki Heart Anchor technique to center yourself in unconditional love. * Relaxation - Stress "Toys": For those who like to be hands on, stress toys are a great cure for anger. These are items that can be manipulated to work off stress. These include: "worry stones" which can be rubbed, hand vices which can be pressed, rubber balls which can be squeezed and so on. Better to take our your anger on a stress toy than on someone who you love and do not want to hurt. * Relaxation - Guided Imagery: If the situation allows it, take a few moments to visualize an experience you find profoundly relaxing. Whether it comes from your memory or your imagination, the key is to fill your awareness - using as many senses as possible (see it, hear it, touch it, etc) - with whatever is guaranteed to make you deeply happy. Connecting with joy will automatically calm you down. * Relaxation - Music: If the situation allows it, listen to calming relaxing music. The key is to listen to the "right" music which will put you into states of greater harmony. Not all music has this capability… there is special relaxation music that is guaranteed to soothe the inner dragon within - see the "Sound Cure". * Relaxation - Exercise: If the situation allows it, focus your awareness on relaxing your muscles. There are many slow meditative practices (like yoga) that you can do to calm your mind by relaxing your muscles. If you practice these exercises daily, then you can use them automatically to calm your anger. Anger Cure Part 2: Resourceful Redirection is done by using these techniques: * Redirection - Humor: Laughter is like the bucket of cold water that when poured over rage will put it's fire out. Using laughter means finding something funny in the situation to diffuse the anger. Just like Ally McBeal who visualizes her whining clients as naked babies with rattles crying ridiculously (funny, right?). The idea is not to "laugh off" your problems but to use humor to help calm yourself so you can find more creative solutions. The worst thing you can do is use humor in a harsh or sarcastic way… that is unhealthy and will only make the situation worse. * Redirection - Fantasy: Closely related to laughter is the use of your "interior universe" to deal with the "miscreants making you angry". In your world, where you are supreme ruler and unquestioned authority, you are free to visualize any result that would ease your anger in the situation. A favorite technique of mine is to imagine the miscreants on the floor before my throne, kissing my toes as they apologize. The idea is not to visualize harm to another or to send violence into the universe with the intention of manifesting it but to use fantasy to relieve internal tensions so you can solve the problem. * Redirection - Timing: Timing is everything in life and in anger management. Anger always wants to be dealt with right away. Often, that is a good thing for "justice delayed is justice denied". And yet, putting it off until a better time often will get you what you want sooner, easier, and more effectively. Taking a "time out" to decide the best way to respond to the situation just increases the chances that you will get what you want. Choosing not to argue with someone when they are tired or ill or stressed out honors them and opens them to listen to you. If that means going to bed on your anger, ask your guides and angels to help you wake up with a better solution to resolve the angry situation. * Redirection - Avoidance: Sometimes the best way to deal with anger is to choose to remove yourself from well known sources of it. If your spouse's snoring is robbing you of sleep, bed down in another room. If your child's messy room infuriates you, shut the door and walk away. If driving through a congested area makes your pulse pound, find an alternate route or take public transportation. Learning to avoid the adiaphora ("minor and unimportant things") in your life will help to drain the anger from it and make your interior universe a better place to be. * Redirection - Personal Space: Be sure to schedule "personal time" when you know you need to reduce stress. All working people should have a standing rule that when they come home from work, for the first 15 minutes, "nobody talks to them except in the event of a nuclear holocaust." After this brief quiet time to decompress from the workday, the demands of home life can be better handled. * Redirection - Black/White Think/Speak: Be honest with yourself… do you suffer from "black/white think/speak"? Do you frequently use the words "always" and "never" when talking about a situation you are in? The truth is "always" and "never" are not just inaccurate, they serve to fuel the fire of your anger and alienate people who might otherwise be willing to help you. If you "always" think a situation is hopeless and "never" speak of a solution, you just keep the problem alive. Anger Cure Part 3: Appropriate Asserting is done by using these techniques: * Expression - Logical Problem Solving: The truth is that getting angry is not going to solve anything, that anger cannot make you feel better, and that anger usually makes you feel worse. Anger is telling you that there is a problem to be solved. Since it is a spiritual principle, that every problem contains the solution within it, the best thing you can do is to search for the solution. Where the solution can often be found is in the "Demilitarized Zone" that exists between the positions of the angry parties. So put on "Mr. Spock's Logic Glasses" and look at the problem from the other person's point of view. Shifting perspective from "you-emotions-feelings" to "other-logic-thinking" opens you up to solving the problem. Just be patient with the process and give it your best. * Expression - Open Ears/Open Heart: Asserting yourself in an appropriate way means "opening your ears to open your heart". Anger thrives when you jump to and act on inaccurate conclusions based upon incomplete facts. So slow down and open your ears: listen to what is underlying the anger on your "side" and on the other "side". So often the "stated" issue is not the real one (ie. "I said I am angry because you forgot my birthday, but I am really angry because I fear you do not love me"). As you listen, you can slow down, think carefully about what you want to say, and take your time before answering. Then open your heart being less concerned to "defend your position" than to solve the problem at hand. * Expression - Rightness vs Effectiveness: Nothing fuels anger like thoughts and feelings that you are "morally right" and that others who "block the light of right" must be "dealt with". Nothing is harder to do than argue with someone who is right because they are "right, right?". Here is where you must make a choice: is it more important to be right or to be human? When you choose to be human, you are creating a space for others to be "wrong" and for them not to share in the "rightness of your cause". Often when you are right and choose to back off a bit, you give them an opening to see your side of things. If you are in fact right, that should be apparent and they may well surprise you by seeing things your way. And if they do, is that not much more effective for you in achieving your goal? You are darn right it is! * Expression - Needs vs Demands: Angry people express their demands, calm ones express their needs. When you say to someone "I demand" or "I must have", you automatically put them on the defensive because you have attacked them. Since they must defend themselves, they have no time or space to consider your point of view. Yet when you say to someone "I need" or "I want help", you invite them to be generous and helpful and to think well of themselves (for you just told them that they are needed and important, right?). You open their time and space to help achieve your goals (better for you, right?). * Expression - Be Cool: There is a fine line between being assertive (asking for what you want in a way honoring others) and being aggressive (promoting your needs at the expense of others). What usually keeps an assertive person from crossing the line into aggression is their willingness to be "calm, cool, and collected" because they trust that God is "out there" to support the fulfillment of their needs. * Expression - Ban Verbal Violence: When you swear, curse, exaggerate, over dramatize, or "blow things out of all proportion", you are committing verbal violence. And "violence in the voice is often only the death rattle of reason in the throat." (John Boyes) If you choose to ban verbal violence from your beingness, you have automatically put yourself into the space of being the solution and not the problem. And that is the whole point of anger… to motivate you to solve problems in more creative and peaceful ways.